sleep methods for an overtired baby...and problems with diapers

i tried the "cry it out" method this morning. elenora has been overtired the past two days, leaving us with a very cranky, crying baby who won't fall asleep when she's tired. it's because in the middle of her nap on monday i had to take her to my six week appointment with the midwives. she didn't sleep in the car as i'd hoped. she was awake the entire appointment (yes, they did the full pap smear with her on my chest). she was awake and crying the whole way home, and she slept only fitfully for about two hours before deciding to be awake for about five hours in the evening. tuesday was just as bad.

add to that the multiple episodes each day and night of diapers that leak onto her clothing and you have a very frazzled mother.

i'm so sick of changing her clothes because the poop has leaked out onto them. aren't diapers supposed to prevent this??? i'm completely out of outfits that fit her. they're all in the hamper or hanging all over my bathroom after spending the time spot treating and scrubbing them. it seems like every time she poops i end up with a crying, naked baby on the changing table.

tuesday i changed her about five times. my friend a. showed up to visit and found me crying, ella crying, and j. completely out of his mind. elenora kept herself awake for five more hours on tuesday night before literally conking out from exhaustion.

so i'm trying to find a way to avoid this. i've been going the dr. sears method. but you look up "overtired" in dr. sears' book and it has nothing about that. it suggests "wearing your baby down", but ella doesn't like just being carried in the snuggly while i do my own thing. and this eratic bedtime is really wearing on us. dr. sears is all about carrying your baby everywhere all the time and sleeping with your baby.

sometimes i want her to sleep in her crib so that i can get something done around here. and i'm afraid of what will happen when i go back to work if she doesn't have a better schedule and can't go to sleep peacefully or stay asleep if she's put down.

mom B. got us a book titled "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". i haven't read much, but it appears that this book advocates the opposite of dr. sears' methods. this book says that a baby can't sleep as deeply if they are being held by someone or rocked in a swing. this doctor wants the baby to be in her own crib in a dark room with no lights or music or vibrating anything or swinging anything... the book talks about the "cry it out" method. it suggests just putting the baby in the crib and letting them cry it out. it claims that a few nights of that and the baby will be on a good schedule and be able to put herself to sleep and sleep through the night and not be overtired anymore.

i'm all for not having an overtired baby. so today when ella was tired after our morning play time i thought i'd try the cry it out method. granted i haven't read the book very much at all, and maybe i did it wrong or she's too young, but here's what happened.

it was awful. i took her to my bed with me and just laid down quietly next to her. she started crying. i just laid there with my hand on her hand. she cried harder. i just laid there. she screamed and choked and coughed and kicked and cried, and i just laid there. for fifteen minutes. then i couldn't bear it anymore so i picked her up and held her close and rocked her and jiggled her up and down in my arms and took her to the rocking chair and cuddled her.

she eventually did fall asleep for three hours... when i laid down next to her and nursed her peacefully off to sleep. i slept, too.

now she's asleep in her swing, and i finally got the house tidied a bit.

so much for "healthy sleep habits."

what do other mothers do??? i feel like i'm doing it all wrong. but how do you reconcile two respected doctors' advice when they both have research to back up their conflicting methods? dr. sears warns you of people who will try to get you to let your baby cry it out. but the other guy has a lot of medical research backing him up. i don't know what to do. i just want elenora to sleep and to have the maximum benefits from both her awake time and her sleep.

please, if you're a mother and have ideas, let me know.