monologue

this be a blanket.

one more book.

leave it outside.

get a step stool.

ella's step stool.

look like a mouse.

it does.

let's sit.

good girl.

this be a blanket. dress. round you.

you hold this. you move this. i will put it on.

super baby out. next to ella.

shapes. star. a star. mommy get it. okay.

dancing.

little star

2 days of rain brought us to a rare trip to the mall yesterday.  i think we've taken ella to the mall 2 times in her life (including this trip), plus maybe 4 times we've gone just to picture people to have her photo taken.  i really hate the mall.  we did our part to stimulate the economy by purchasing 4 sheets of stickers to help occupy our time on the plane in 2 weeks.  and we let ella sit on the big plastic merry-go-round.  she liked the train best of all and started spontaneously saying "lovely tea mabel," which is from a book we have titled "and the train goes..."  we were going to let elenora poke her head into the pet shop, but it apparently is a victim of the economic recession.  which i don't mind terribly.  there are too many animals in this world who need good homes without [in]breeding more just to charge $1000 for a puppy.  (why does the mall bring out my soap box?)  j. was hungry, so we went to the food court.  also a victim of the recession, there were about 4 places offering food.  not wanting to give ella sushi or pizza, we ended up at mcdonalds.  oh the shame on my face as i sat there feeding my baby chicken nuggets and milk from a bottle with a weird red-and-yellow man on it!  j. remarked on how uncomfortable i looked.  that food is so nasty.  ugh.

tomorrow we are going to maine to see my grampa and uncle and cousin e., who is pregnant.  we'll spend our day by the lake under the trees.  much more my idea of fun.

last night when we got home i turned on the lights in elenora's room because the cloud cover made her room dark, and she suddenly started saying "twinkle twinkle little star, how i wonder what you are, up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky..." over and over!  i didn't know she knew the entire thing in order to recite it.  she's never done that before.  then she'd say "another song" and start in on "close your eyes my little baby girl" and then she'd say "another song" and recite "jesus loves me this i know" all the way through.  

j. grabbed the video camera and we got some good footage.

i did a lot of cooking last night.  during ella's snack time i chopped onion and garlic and mixed up the dry ingredients for a meatloaf (ella liked watching "mommy's chopping an onion"), so i finished mixing that and cooked it for dinner.  then i made cupcakes for k.'s birthday celebration tonight.  i was going to make an apple pie but decided to leave that for today.  i'm taking it up to grampa's.

j. and i are into a new tv program lately.  it's called "in treatment" and is focused around a therapist.  we watched a few episodes on demand last night.

memorial day weekend

friday night ella slept over at momby's and j. and i went to newburyport for dinner.  ate at a restaurant called oreganos.  then we took a walk in the gorgeous night air by the ocean water.

saturday morning we went to momby's house to spend time with ella before i left for vt.  she was next door petting the neighbor's cat, named Mephistopheles.  oh yes.  you guessed it.  

me: "ella?  can you say 'Mephistopheles'?" 

ella: "meph-a-tah-fo-lees!"

we took her out to breakfast and the waitress came around asking if we wanted any more coffee.  i said "no coffee, thank you." and as the waitress walked away ella said "no coffee thank you" and the waitress turned around and came back and said "did she just say 'no coffee thank you'? how old is she?!"  

elenora is 20 months as of yesterday.

this morning i asked her what the neighbor's cats' names are at mam-aw's house, and ella said "one is mia. one is mephistopheles."

also this morning, she pulled out her toy stroller and said "ella's too big for super baby's stroller. bubba fits."  i swear she said all that.

my trip to vermont was lovely.  it made me so happy to be in the green mountain state.  i didn't even mind the long drive--so beautiful.  i stopped at a rest area in sharon, vt, and some old ladies from a church were there with a coffee break table with all kinds of baked goods.  i was really hungry, so i went over and picked up a ziplock bag of chex mix and a pastry and a cup of coffee and looked around and saw a donations can and stuck $5 into it.  but then i thought i should probably double check that it was really by donation, so i asked one of the ladies "is this by donation?" and she said "oh yes, we donate all the money to charities in the white river junction area" and then she was looking at me and i didn't know if she'd seen me put my $5 in the can, so i opened my purse and put in another $2.  

i call it my "seinfeld" moment.

seeing a. was so much fun.  we haven't seen each other in over a year and a half, but we have that kind of easy friendship that picks right up where you left it.  i had 2 hours with just her and then we went to make scones and lemon curd at c.'s house.  we drank red truck wine and joked around until after 11.  sunday morning i helped set up the room for the tea and then a. and i made 2 quiches.  the afternoon tea party went off without a hitch.  at first i was super awkward, but a. suddenly confessed how awkward she felt, herself, and said "you're coming to sit with me, right?" which made me feel so much better.  i hadn't wanted to presume that i could sit next to the bride, but i would have been so stressed out if i'd had to sit among strangers.  what an introvert i am!  

the drive home went well.  i got home around 9:40 pm.  at midnight ella woke up and cried "mommy" and i went in and she and i both enjoyed snuggling for 15 minutes.  i had missed her so much.

today k. came over to play with elenora, and we walked downtown to zumis for ice cream.  then this afternoon we went to the brunners' for a cookout.  ella was being so cute at the dinner table--counting to 11 by herself and then clapping along with everyone else.  she also recited part of this children's book "noisy nora"...if j. say's "quiet said her father" ella says "hush, said mum...nora...sister...why you dumb?" (the real words are "'hush,' said her mum. 'nora,' said her sister, 'why are you so dumb?'")

now j. and i are just relaxing.  it's one of those evenings that is so nice out we wish we could go for a walk or play tennis.  oh well.  you take them when you can.

transcript of solo play time

(while looking at a baby animals book)

that's it.

that's a purple kitty.

hug a little kitty.

find a kitty.

yeah.

ella find it.

ella find one, two kitties.

oh yeah.

found a kitty.

find a baby cow.

that's a cow too.

baby duck.

find a baby kitty. 

kitty cat.

meow meow.

that's a kitty, too.

lay down.

find a little book.

mommy help you...mommy help me.

soo come.  yeah.

find lady bugs.

(goes to dollhouse, presses the doorbell)

press that one more time.

door opens.

soo coming.

steps. steps.

(goes to her room)

put it away, yeah.

come here.

pick you up. (picks up pillow)

bring it outside.

two purple pillows.

(goes to get her shoes)

new shoes. 

mommy help you.

massahhhhge

for mother's day this year j. gave me the gift of an hour long massage at a local spa, which happened yesterday.  massages are not something i ever really treat myself with, so it was such a special experience.  half-way through the massage i kind of got choked up because it meant so much to me to be the one getting taken care of.  being a mother, you are always the one taking care of someone other than yourself.

it's been hot outside.  yesterday was 90 degrees and today will be almost as hot.  i walked elenora downtown and treated her to a kiddie cup of strawberry ice cream at a little local cafe.  that's the first time i've done that with her--sitting outside of a cafe with her sharing a cup of ice cream.  it was really lovely.  then we walked along the river a little while before heading home.

speaking of taking care of myself, i'm still going to the gym every morning.  it has so easily become part of my routine.  i'm so glad i have discovered that fitting it in before work makes it happen for me.

friday mornings (right now) i go to work out and then i come home until 10 am before going to work.  i get about 20 minutes of solitude and quiet to just drink my coffee and relax before getting ella up for the day.  it's a nice slow start to my morning--which i don't get any other morning.

tomorrow i'm heading to vt for a bridal shower, but tonight elenora is sleeping over at momby's so that j. and i can possibly have a picnic at the beach in the evening.  then tomorrow morning we'll go over there to spend some time with ella before i head to vt.  i'll be home sunday night.

work is going well.  my co-worker is going faster this week...so if we can sustain her speed my work life will get drastically easier over the coming weeks.

beach

ella and i went to the beach today and yesterday.  forget the "dirty" complaint.  yesterday when we arrived she immediately put her hands out in front of her and dove into the sand.  i got her a pail and she sat for a good while shoveling sand into it.  today i walked down the beach with her and we came to a little wading pool that had a stream down to the ocean water and we had a lot of fun splashing through the stream.  she was saying "splishy splashy" and laughing.  

her verbal capacity leaves us amazed.  she is saying all kinds of sentences, and if you say "ella, can you say..." she will say anything.

oh, we are having fun, baby!

so elenora has started saying "hi sweetheart" to us as a greeting.  could she have a sweeter disposition?

in her tubby lately her favorite thing to do is to take her little plastic playschool people and give them baths.  she takes them one at a time and says "time for bath, suzie. time for bath, becca."  then she picks them out of her tubby and puts them in a row along the tub saying "line up everybody."  she'll even move them around and say "next" as in "next to" or "[george] in middle" to put him in the middle of the others.  then she'll say "how about betty blondie?" and plop betty blondie in the tub with a "kerplink" (think little sal).

the other night when i was getting her dressed after her tub she put out her foot when i was getting her shirt ready and said "feet! feet!" and when i put her shirt over her ankle she burst out laughing as if she'd really tricked me good.

tonight after her tubby we were joking around and she got all excited and a little bit wound up and all i had to say was "ella, can you touch my face with a soft touch?" and she started gently brushing her fingers over my cheeks, my nose, my mouth, my eyes, and my forehead.

here are some other phrases/words she's said recently that i wrote down:

brush your teeth.

mommy do it.

daddy's dinner. mommy's dinner. ella's dinner.

daddy share with you.

i'm verbal.

beautiful butterfly.

have a baby bite.

flag pole

american flag

this little piggy...

last night as i was dressing ella after her tub she started pointing to her toes and saying "this piggy went market, this piggy stayed home."  it was so adorable.

this morning while i fed her breakfast we heard j. stirring in our bedroom and i asked her "what's daddy doing?"  i expected her to say something like "waking up" or "getting up" or "sleeping" and instead she said "putting on socks."  which just struck me as so original i laughed really hard. (later j. told me that in the mornings when he watches her he usually only goes to our room to put on socks, so that's why she made that comment.)

ella's new thing is cinnamon milk.  she loves when i sprinkle the cinnamon on her milk.  and i have to agree that it makes the milk yummy.  but she doesn't understand why i won't put the cinnamon in her water.  

i took ella grocery shopping yesterday (rainy day) and she was a huge helper.  i handed her the items and she would twist around and drop them into the cart.  she's so well behaved when we go out.  she said hi to a man and i could just see his heart melt.  he said "that's a happy little girl you've got there."  when we were in the checkout line she started tipping her head back and i tickled her lightly under her chin and she just dissolved into giggles.  there's really no better sound.

this morning she was playing with her sunglasses.  she would put them on and say "too dark" and take them off and say "way" (as in "put them away").

as she ate her blueberries she said "some are big. some are little. this one's juicy."

the other day we looked at yet another condo (too little). on the way there i told her we were going to walk around and take a look at a new house.  while i was looking around, i overheard ella saying to herself "taking a look" and "walk around."

other phrases/words i've heard her use the past few days (i keep scribbling them down on an envelope as she says them so i don't forget):

focus (she repeated this after j. told her to focus on drinking her milk)

big daddy bite.

take a bite baby.

ella kicks it.

i see you.

i will get you one.

i am. (in response to an "are you..." question.)

pink triangle (she said this about a piece of a strawberry at dinner time that was, indeed, shaped like a triangle)

tonight elenora is spending the night at momby's so that j. and i can noisily go through our apartment and do some spring cleaning.  then we're going to treat ourselves to a nice dinner out.

dolly

sunday i stopped by a yard sale and found an antique doll who is about 7 inches tall with eyes that open and shut, strawberry blonde hair, and a fancy spanish flamenco outfit with sequins and gold thread.  ella has nothing like this doll, who we named "dolly."  at first she was a little bit nervous about the doll opening and shutting her eyes--she kept looking at me and saying "mommy fix it."  but now she is really sweet with her dolly.  today in the car she was eating some crackers and drinking some water and she kept offering some to dolly.  so cute.

we went to aurora's house today to play while s. went to apply for a job.  the girls and i had fun outside entertaining each other.  i guess i haven't really done much of watching ella along with another child when i'm the only adult around.  certainly not since the weather has been nice.  it was quite a new dynamic, which i liked because i got to observe these little human beings in a new situation.  they were so cute running and jumping and taking turns on the tricycle.  we "crunched" leaves and stomped our feet and tossed a ball around.  but there was a moment where we were standing on the porch spinning and stomping and aurora went to give ella a hug and ella was dizzy and they both fell over and aurora hit the back of her head on the door frame and got a huge bump.  i felt so so bad.  she was such a sweetie and didn't even cry at all.  i  immediately carried them both upstairs into the house and got out a bag of peas and sat on the couch with the peas held to her head.  after awhile aurora wanted to eat the frozen peas.  so i guess she was okay.  but such a huge bump!  all the way home and all evening i had this tugging in my throat as if ella had been the one who'd gotten her head hurt, and i kept rubbing the back of her head to check that she was okay.  i just feel so badly about it.

monday i received news that my sister-in-law miscarried on mother's day.  what a heartbreaking thing.  they've been trying for so long... it made me think of a., so i called her to ask how she was and to make sure she was okay and she told me that she had also miscarried.  i can't imagine going through all the excitement over being pregnant and planning for a baby and then to go through the pain of losing that baby.  my prayers go out for them and their families.

mother's day

new phrases, of course!

ball. lose it. 

there you go!

flip-flop

funny plate, happy monster, silly fork.

there it is.

two oranges.

how now brown cow.

ella home now.

see ya sunday.

mommy picked those.

soo picked it.

auntie heather

uncle jay

walk away.

over there.

two feet kicking

floppy ears

falling down the well.

tikki tikki tembo

ella's been randomly saying "tiki tiki tembo" for fun.  (it's a children's book i have that was read to me when i was little...the boy's name in this book is "tikki tikki tembo no sa rembo chari bari ruchi pip peri pembo).  sometimes she tries to say the whole thing and it sounds like "tikki tikki tembo no embo chari buchi pip perio".  so cute.

h. and i took her to the beach yesterday afternoon.  it was the perfect afternoon and nobody was there.  the water was calm and elenora was very comfortable running around and burying her feet in the sand.  she loves seashells, but she doesn't like it when she picks up two shells that are still stuck together and then they break apart.  she looks at me and says "mommy fix it!" and i say "i can't fix it" and she gets a little sad.

this morning j. and i took elenora out to breakfast.  she likes eating my spinach, cheese, and salsa omelette, hot apples, and wheat toast (which we put grape jelly on today).  she's getting really good at feeding herself, too. 

after we ate we took her to the river downtown and took a walk over the bridge.  ella likes to climb up on the benches and she says "watching" and i'll say "what are we watching?" and she says "river."

this afternoon we all went to the ocean.  my favorite thing to do there is just to sit and watch as elenora toddles off on her own discovery.  i like that she can go 200 feet away without being unsafe, and i get to observe her as this individual who is separate from myself.  she's so fun to watch, as she comments on everything around her.  she's so interested in the seagulls and the seashells and the kites and the other children.

tonight momby bathed and put ella to bed while j. and i went out to dinner at our favorite mexican restaurant.  their sangria is so good, and i always enjoy their pescado dishes.  then we went to see a foreign film called "cherry blossom" that was really good.  half of it was set in japan.

tomorrow is my second mother's day.  

here are some words/phrases from ella:

daddy's taking another shower.

a hungry caterpillar.

two people, talking.

buttercup

hot apples

grape jelly

bread pudding

i made a bread pudding today.  oh my god it's good.  there's nothing healthy about it.  but i had some crusty leftover french bread and raisins etc. and the aroma as it cooked was so fragrant.  j. and i had a bowl when it was still warm and it was amazing.  

here's the recipe:

Ingredients:

2 cups whole milk
1/4 cup butter
2/3 cup sugar (white or brown, depending on taste preference, i used brown)
3 eggs
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 cups bread, torn into small pieces (french bread works best)
1/2 cup raisins (optional)

Directions:

1. In medium saucepan, over medium heat, heat milk (or half & half) just until film forms over top. Combine butter and milk, stirring until butter is melted. Cool to lukewarm.

2. Combine sugar, eggs, cinnamon, nutmeg, and vanilla. Beat with an electric mixer at medium speed for 1 minute. Slowly add milk mixture.

3. Place bread in a lightly greased 1 1/2 quart casserole.

4. Sprinkle with raisins if desired. Pour batter on top of bread.

5. Bake at 350 degrees F for 45 to 50 minutes or until set. Serve warm.

i took ella back to russell orchard this week.  the guinea hens (the ones with "poke-o-dots") were chasing each other around the farm yard and jumping over things and hopping up onto the fences, and they were so comical elenora and i just stood there laughing at them.  they have such small heads and such large bodies... then a goat came over to the fence and stuck its neck out of the fence and reached its nose up towards us and cocked its head and ella was laughing all over again.  animals are so funny.

it's pretty cool that we parents get the opportunity to do childish things like laugh at animals--something we probably wouldn't do in front of other adults if we didn't have our children by our sides leading the way.

there was a dad there with his precocious 3-year-old daughter.  i have never seen a father look less enthusiastic about spending the afternoon with his little girl.  he just stood back 10 feet from her and kept saying "chloe" in an annoyed voice.  and she was cute, too.  not a naughty girl.  it's sad, because it was the perfect set-up for him to really have fun with her.  she sort of attached herself to me and ella, which was OK, but also uncomfortable because i then had this strange man following me around while i engaged his daughter in conversation.  i'm so thankful for how involved j. is in elenora's life.  he loves spending time with her.  we're both lucky to be able to know that when we're not with ella she is being taken care of 100% wonderfully by the other parent.

russell orchard

yesterday morning we took ella out to breakfast (on my way to the car ella was saying "breakfast. daddy coming too.") and then we jaunted over to russell orchard for the opening day!  i'm so excited that they are open again.  it was surprisingly quiet for opening day, but that was really nice for letting elenora just get down and run around.  here are the animals we saw (and yes, she was saying "animals" although it sounded like the classic child's "aminals"): ducks, cat, chickens, guinea hen (ella said this had "poke-o-dots"), the 1000 lb pig, a goat, 3 sheep (we got to touch one!), 3 ponies, a bunny rabbit (ella said it goes "hip-hop"), and geese.  what a fun place!  we saw tractors and flowers and got to feed the ducks with a little feed.  it's amazing to me that we get to go there for free.  endless entertainment.  we'll be there a lot this summer.

j. and i got to have a date on friday night.  we went to windward, which is always fun.  we split a shrimp and scallop appetizer and then j. had a steak and i had haddock with lobster.  during the meal j. happened to mention that he sees no reason for us to not get pregnant by the end of this year if his job stays secure throughout the summer.  which was a huge surprise to me.  but not altogether unpleasant.  i think if he's game, i am.  (and if he's not, that's fine with me!)  we'll see.

today we took elenora to byfield parish because momby was the guest pianist there this week.  it's not really the way for us to do church.  it starts (and ends) much later than essex congregational, and the nursery is so crowded that i decided to keep ella in the cry room at the back of the sanctuary while j. sat in the pews.  even though they pipe the service into a speaker in the room and you can see the sanctuary through a sound-proof glass, i didn't get to listen at all since there were 6 children and 3 mothers in the room.  i much prefer going to essex and putting ella in the nursery and sitting with j. in the pews.  but after church we let elenora toddle up the aisle to her grandma and she loved discovering this room with dark red carpets, huge ceilings, and rows of pews to run through.  

she didn't fall asleep for her nap until almost 2 pm, but then she slept till almost 4.  i made a chicken, rice and broccoli casserole (secret ingredient: curry) while she slept and then started a new book.  i finished "small island" last night.  really enjoyed it.  now i'm reading brothers karamazov again because i realized it's been 8 years since i read it last and k. recommended a good translation that i haven't read before.  i'm a few chapters in already, and loving it.

here are some ella phrases:

ella do it.

i do it.

ella's shadow...mommy's shadow.

sitting on it.

russell orchard

umbrella fort

mommy fort/tunnel (for when i'm cooking and she makes a game out of climbing between my legs)

pushing it (when she's pushing her tyke trike or stroller)

glass of water

nothing (as in "ella, what is in your plastic easter egg?")

sometimes

arm pit

scooping

dipping

tomato juice (just tried this tonight...loved it)

"each peach pear plum"

 i have it.

mommy help you.

pick, pick, bigger clover.

behind you.

barrette

k. gave ella some adorable barrettes.  here's a photo of one of them: